It has become apparent that my book isn’t doing as well as Tony and I hoped. Yes, yes, I got a reasonable cash advance; yes, yes, I’ve got a highly paid job in the judiciary; yes, yes, I’ve made piles of cash from those flats in
Anyway, readers and fans of this blog will already know a lot of this, but for those of you hopping in by accident or chance, perhaps as a result of the Google Search you did for “wide mouthed money shot” or “big mouthed whoring”, I am going to give you a taster of what you’re missing if you don’t buy my book.
READ how I grew up in a poor socialist household with nowt but builders sand to eat!
READ how I met Tony and we planned to RULE the WORLD!
READ how clever I am at everything!
READ what an utter shit Gordon Brown is! But how Tony is helping him. Bless.
READ how Tony and I got it on at Balmoral right next to the Queen’s bedroom and I got up the duff! Stick it to the man! If that’s not socialism I don’t know what is!*
READ how much Tony and I do it in a week!
READ how sorry I am about getting found out about being financially involved with Carol Kaplan's sheister boyfriend. But how good the housing market in Bristol is (if you know the right people)!
READ how I discovered fake crying abilities from my actor/lush father! But want to distance myself from him otherwise.
READ how many famous folk give us freebies cos they think we are ace!
So go on, buy the book, you cheap bastards! Tony's lecture tours aren't coining it in as much as we'd like. Seems no-one wants to hear him speak.
And, this blog no longer needs to be anonymous as I've nothing to lose...Buy my frigging book! It's me Cherie Blair!!!! I'm still important!!! You hear me!
* Actually I don’t, but it’s all seemed to do well for Tony and I, whatever it is….
6 comments:
Love the photo, Cherie. You have the expression of a woman who just felt her finger go through the toilet paper. Exquisite.
I argue her status as a woman. She can't be as she looks too much like an escaped, failed experiment of a lonely, mad scientist in GREAT need of an eye check.
So, to misquote Woody Allen, she has the head of a woman, and the body of a woman... but not the same woman.
I'm surprised you haven't put this blog on pay-per-view, or whatever it's called in internet-speak.
She makes me cringe, really, I am ashamed to be the same gender, I feel sick...(making puke noises)
Really, you are all as bad as the foul media who made me fess up about my dodgy property dealings, took pictures of poor Euan when he was "unwell" in the fountain in Trafalgar Square and brought me a bunch of flowers that post election morning before I had my face on.
Can I just say though that I don't include my dear wealthy friend, media magnate Silvio Berlusconi, in that description of "foul media". he is above reproach and has some very nice holiday homes...
Post a Comment