Blog Name: The Bank of England

In my capacity as Governor of the Bank of England, I carry many burdens upon my shoulders. Inflation, deflation, recession, depression, exchange rates and interest rates, avoiding fiscal prurience and staving off alien invasion.

My recent decision to implement a program of quantitive easing, to inject new money into the economy, was not arrived at without a great deal of thought. Clearly, in desperate times, we must consider turning to desperate measures. I feel I speak for the whole country, however when I say that even as our printing presses churn out more banknotes by the million, we can take some comfort in the knowledge that the measures are working and the banks are indeed queuing up to sell me their government bonds, which will help to release more capital into the economy.

And I can say to you all, that although we have acted quickly, we have not acted hastily. Indeed, we have little time to spare. Our economy is at a turning point and we must be sure to steer it in the right direction to encourage the money to flow once more which will give us the means to defend ourselves against the Treens, who even now are massing their armies on that distant world.

Yes, some are uncertain as to how effective these measure will be in the long term, but they should weigh their words carefully. A little pain today is preferable to Treen stormtroopers goose-stepping down Whitehall tomorrow, whilst that creature who is evil personified, the Emperor Mekon, takes the salute from the steps of his Imperial Command Ship.

I know that these are worrying times. Indeed, I am just as worried as anyone. In fact, I haven't slept for three months now and if it wasn't for the bathroom fairies scrubbing my armpits every morning, I wouldn't have washed either. But we must go forward, heads held high, and do battle with the new Axis of Evil, namely Inflation and His Foulness, the Emperor Mekon. We can prevail. We will fight them on the beaches and we will go forward into sunlit uplands, lit by the candles of Victory.

In the meantime, this blog shall remain anonymous - there are spies everywhere. Trust no one!